Do you know the real me?

Diary entry: Wednesday, November 20



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I don’t know why I keep updating this website. Maybe it’s the same reason I keep updating that stupid profile—because I’m hoping somebody will see it.



I’m going on a date today. I know, an actual date. I thought that if I act like someone else, it won’t be as scary, or as real. And if I get rejected, then it’s not because they didn’t like me, but because they didn’t like this fake off-putting persona. But I kind of hate it. I wish I was ready to be myself in front of another person, that I could be softer and romantic and talk about Carly Rae Jepsen (I put her on my concert list hoping someone would notice it was off). It feels like a distant dream, but maybe it’s possible for me. I really want it to be.



I wonder if anyone will ever find this. I don’t know. If you did, and you’re reading this, can I be the real me around you?